Ok, ok, fake life is a little dramatic. But what I want to know is, are you living your most authentic life? So many of us are caught up in the rat race trying to make ends meet that somewhere along the path we lost ourselves and fell inline with routine, losing our sense of joy and purpose.
With the rise of social media and comparisonitis, more and more of us are putting on for others and trying too hard to keep up with the Joneses, much to our own detriment.
Leading a life that is inauthentic means you are not being true to yourself and your beliefs. A fake life is one that is led to please others but does not please you. When you decide to live more authentically, you make the choice to accept yourself, including your flaws and strengths.
You make decisions based on what you value and believe, and you stop engaging in self-defeating habits that thwart your success and ability to reach your goals.
To live an authentic life, one that is not fake to yourself or others, means you know yourself well, you act in ways that uphold your beliefs, and you stop judging yourself and others for being less than perfect creatures.
How can you tell if you’re living a fake life versus one that is truly authentic? Here are six signs to watch out for.
1. You spend money on things to help you “cope” with your life.
Whether it’s expensive dinners, manicures, massages, or new clothes, if part of you feels the need to engage in “retail therapy” just to relieve stress or get through your week, chances are you are not living your most authentic life.
When you aren’t being true to yourself, you make choices in your personal and professional life that are not aligned with your beliefs or values and it creates stress.
These friction points build up, and eventually, you need to let off some steam. If you find yourself seeking out ways to spend money to feel better, you may be leading a fake life.
Purchases of indulgence and luxury should be done from a place of joy and abundance, not a crux to make up for stress. Instead, find the cause of the stress and work at eliminating it from your life and choose more mindful ways to release the stress meanwhile.
Related: How to Find Your Purpose in Life
2. You live your life just waiting for your next vacation.
If you spend your days waiting until 5:00, your weeks hoping for Friday, or your months endlessly daydreaming about your next vacation, you may not be living your most authentic life. When your life is fake, you need to “get away” from it, and you spend a lot of time imagining how much happier you will be when you’re away from your day-to-day.
If you are living a life that is authentic to your values and beliefs, you are not as compelled to plan elaborate vacations or spend weeks away just to unwind. When you love your life and are living according to your true wishes and values, you don’t need to escape to be happy. Happiness is right there waiting for you each day when you get out of bed.
3. You never have time.
When you are living an inauthentic life, you never have enough time, whether it be to spend with friends, to work out, for hobbies or fun, or to focus on your own personal development.
If your fake life is causing you to spend time projecting the image you think you are supposed to or has you busy trying to “cope” with your existence, it’s hard to find quiet moments of solitude or reflection. Living a life that is yours and is true to you means you are not merely surviving but thriving.
4. You find it hard to experience joy.
If you spend your time thinking about what others have or focused on what is missing in your life, rather than being grateful for your life’s opportunities, you may be leading an inauthentic life.
Being fake means you focus on what you don’t have, what others have instead of you, or what is wrong in your life. This robs you of joy and happiness, leading to more feelings of negativity.
5. Your health may be suffering.
If you are so stressed out living your life that you can’t enjoy your life, it’s a good indication your life isn’t very authentic.
If you need regular massages to help you cope with all your stress, or if you find yourself emotionally eating as a coping strategy, your health and your happiness are suffering.
6. You care more about what others think than about your own beliefs.
Focusing on what others think is the true sign of a fake life. No one should matter more in your life than you. It is your happiness that is most important. When you learn to focus only on what you think is important, you can finally start living the most authentic version of your life.
If you’ve identified any of these signs in your own life, perhaps it is time to start designing a life that is yours and living the best life you can imagine.
Living an inauthentic life isn’t just about putting on for others but also includes doing something that you really rather would not be doing.
Ever hear the saying, do what you can now til you can do what you want? How about you started doing more of what you want right now? Your purpose in life is to live joyfully and the more steps you take to do more of what you love, then the more you’ll find yourself truly happy.
When you’re truly happy, it shines naturally and you won’t have to put on for others or take actions that leave you stressed. How can you begin today to do more of what you love?
For more questions to ask yourself that will help you to uncover more of who you truly are and what makes you tick, consider taking my free 30-day Get to Know Me challenge.
It’s one of the first exercises I encourage those who are trying to find their calling in life to take as the questions asked within are powerful at uncovering your purpose ad helping you to design your greatest life.